The End

I am happy to announce that I am now a novelist. Or maybe novellaist is a more appropriate title. I’ve never been so sleep deprived in my life. I didn’t get more than 12 hours of sleep a day. I vaguely recall going out to smoke on the balcony on day 2 of the contest. We don’t have a balcony and I don’t smoke, which makes me wonder what I was doing and/or hallucinating at that time.

The female helped me by keeping a fresh saucer of the ol’ liquid motivation always at paw and distributing serviceable portions of tuna as required. At one point, the keys on the keypad stopped registering. The female had to go in with slivers of tape between the keys to get the fur out. We started butting heads on day 3. She may have provided the monetary backing for this project, but creativity was my sole provision and I had to take the claws out to make her realize that.

Last year’s winner had a total of 144 pages. I set this as my goal but choose not to add 83 pages of filler to meet that goal. A cat has a certain artistic integrity what cannot be done away with in any circumstances. Its been nearly 22 hours since we finished the project. I spent this time catching lost sleep. The female had to go to her place of work today and came back blurry eyed and yawning. She has poured herself a glass of the ol’ liquid de-motivation and I think will be sleeping soundly soon.



  1. Frisket of Pella Books Said:

    Good luck with this contest, espeicaLy everyone knows cats simply do not have the emotional depth to write anything worth while.

    • Jeeves Said:

      hiss, hiss, meow, mow. Cats are naturally contemplative and curious creatures. I’d like to see a dog do better! There is more to life than begging and going for walks.

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